Why Did it Take me This Long to Reach Out?

For a long time I didn't talk to anyone because at first I assumed we were just on the longer curve for conception, and the big 'infertility' word wasn't really an issue. But each time a cycle ended without my becoming pregnant, my frustration grew.


Since my husband and I are both on the older side (32) for 1st time parents (I realize that there are many of you out there older even, I'm describing the medical profession's opinion!) I waited less than the recommended 12 months before getting ourselves to a fertility clinic...more on that later. Even after we started fertility treatments, I didn’t really want to start a group, let alone a blog, because I knew, I just knew I would be pregnant the very next month, so what was the point. Well, it has been a long stretch of ‘next month for sure,’ with still no baby.  So, while I hope and pray that this next cycle finds me pregnant, I am starting the blog anyway, and will continue to facilitate infertility group, because I believe in my heart that both are desperately needed in my community.

As soon as I started talking with other women who were going through the same things, the same tests, the same fears, I felt incredibly strengthened, and empowered.  I learn from my friends in the group every day about how to face trials with grace, persevere and  conquer problems. I get ideas on how to talk to Drs., questions to ask, medication to request. After hearing about how pro-active my Awesome fertility doctor is (Dr. Barry Witten) a dear friend switched to his clinic and started getting immediate results and better care. If we had never talked about infertility, an uncomfortable and often ‘taboo’ subject, that could never have happened. More than anything, the women in the group give me hope. And as dear as my husband is, he would have had no idea what to say to me as I paced the parking lot at work, sobbing my heart out because an IUI had failed and my period had just started. But another darling friend from group DID know what to say. Which, really - was nothing. She just cried on the phone with me.

What is infertility support group? It is a literal fulfillment of the covenant to “bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light,” to “comfort those who stand in need of comfort” and to “mourn with those that mourn.” Mosiah 18:8-9.